INTIMACY

Intimacy is a close familiarity or friendship. Intimacy is a bit different from closeness since intimacy has to do with the experience of knowing another person and being known by him/her. In this, I will love to talk about an intimate relationship. An intimate relationship is an interpersonal relationship that involves physical and/or emotional intimacy. Physical intimacy is characterised by friendship, platonic love, romantic love or sexual activity. Intimate relationships play a central role in the overall human experience. Humans have a general desire to belong and to love, which is usually satisfied within an intimate relationship.

According to Whitbourne, she says that, “We all need some intimacy in our lives”. Psychology says that, relationships matter to our sense of well being, like we all need relationships to help us feel connected, boost our feelings of self worth and sustain our moods.

So, I think those who have a relationship, they must have that “closeness” or “attachment”. You cannot have a relationship with a person who you are not attached to or who you are not close with. In life, it reaches a time when the intimacy that two people have, fades or breaks and leading “no relationship”. Whereby, there happens a time when most of us asks ourselves like, “Why do people walk away?”

Some people get into your life just to have fun and pass by, actually they never take things seriously. They will make you fall for them, but stop when it becomes too much for you to handle it. Our biggest mistakes is that, we forget our self worth when we are with this kind of people but if we could have been staring them deep into their eyes, would obvious see nothingness. Their eyes look dead, like you’re staring into a black hole, let me call these people “psychopath” as one of the psychologists call them.

These people (psychopaths) have experienced hurtful emotions before and that’s why they do not love anymore and they are so damn good at faking emotions. But the most unbelievable thing is that, they do know that you are into them but still want to play around. When most of us find ourselves in that kind of destruction, we tend to worry a lot and whereby other people become completely depressed (depression is a worse poison).

“DON’T WORRY ON THE THINGS YOU CANT CHANGE”. It is such an easy phrase to say but very hard to do it. Most of us get caught up worrying about things that we cannot change (sometimes I think that, it’s a human nature). No matter how much we know, but still try to make things work out by worrying about them. One of my friends once told me, “ Jazzy, let things flow naturally”. Like, why should you worry why you can’t change it? , just take a nap and hang it over to nature (I am talking about God here, the Supernatural Power). So coming back to our topic “Intimacy” , we spend much of our time worrying why people walk away but instead we could have been working on something else. Have you ever get caught up in a scenario in which, you obviously know the “why” answer but still you want to know “why”. It’s very crazy and I get it. There are so many reasons as to why people walk away,

1. Some people get tired
2. When the purpose is accomplished
3. When you do not feel the same way
4. When the beauty is gone.
5. When you find out, you both want different things.

So, instead of worrying why someone walked away, you can work out on ways to build your intimacy (you have to worry on things that you can change). I will point out three ways on how you can build your high intimacy (I found these ways in a psychology today page).

1. Open yourself to new relationships (intimacy involves a willingness to trust and confide in others).

2. Strengthen your own identity (you have to know what you want, because sometimes you might loose your sense of self worth when it’s too much to handle).

3. Don’t give up on intimacy (sometimes you can’t remain with your partner throughout your life, so if you really value intimacy, you may continue to search until you find the person whose desire for “closeness” matches yours.

All I am trying to say is that, worrying doesn’t worth your time when you obviously know the answer. Lastly, you should know that, INTIMACY IS KEY TO OUR WELL BEING.

                                                                                                                        jajaapsycho